Friday, March 5, 2010

A Second Christmas.

I lurv awards season. My heart’s been all aflutter since the Golden Globes, and now it’s time for the big kahuna, the I Ching, the be all and end all, the fat lady has sung, Elvis has left the building…The Oscars

Come this Sunday, I will be spent from a wonderful family weekend in Atlanta (we’re surprising Daddy for his birthday with tickets to see Lewis Black [and if for some reason Dad-O is reading this…totally just kidding. That’s not your surprise.]), and Sister and I will be settled in, most likely with gluttonous takeout, primed and ready for the festivities to begin!

So in honor of the occasion, I thought I’d relive some awesome Oscar moments (at least awesome from the past 20 years. I mean, I know Joan Crawford won an Oscar for Mildred Pierce, but that’s only because I’ve seen Mommy Dearest one too many times. Which is worth a blog all its own…But I figure I can speak with some authority on movies from 1990 and on up).

Best Year of Best Pictures: 1995

The Nominees: Four Weddings and a Funeral, Pulp Fiction, Quiz Show, Shawshank Redemption and Forrest Gump (The Winner: Forrest Gump)

Seriously. How did they pick that year? Even though I’ve only seen FWAAF a couple of times, you can’t not love it, and that’s saying a lot since I can’t stand Andie MacDowell. And the rest are some of my all time favorites. Way to go ’95!

Excuse me; What won?: 1999 and 2004

1999: Shakespeare in Love. Ok, so…I know I was only 14 when this came out, but I’m pretty sure I knew even then that it barely deserved a nomination, let alone a best picture win. Other nominees: Elizabeth (eh), Life is Beautiful, Thin Red Line and Saving Private Ryan (it’s been a while since I’ve seen it, but I say that’s more of a winner than Shakespeare…). Ignored (aka not amazing but on par with the nominees): Primary Colors, Gods and Monsters, Truman Show

2004: Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. Buhh. The film of five endings. That’s all I really remember, a bunch of trickery and fake-outs. Other nominees: Lost in Translation, Master and Commander, Mystic River (was sure this was winning…just kidding apparently) and Seabiscuit. Overall seems like another lackluster sort of year though.

Best Picture Victories

These just made me happy/giddy/smiley inside.

2009: Slumdog Millionaire. The little movie that could. It beat out naked Kate Winslet in the Reader, CGIed Brad Pitt in Benjamin Button, making out with James Franco Milk and…Frost/Nixon. Truly though, Slumdog’s the first movie I had seen in a while that really made me feel something deep down. I actually cared about the characters, and I still do even after countless screenings. Yay Slumdog!

2008: No Country for Old Men. Even when they disappoint (yeah, I’m talking to you Burn After Reading), the Coen Brothers kick ass, and I love this movie. And Javier Bardem, one of the most intimidating villans with the worst hair. (Oh, and the movie also beat out blah blah Atonement, quirky Juno, boring Michael Clayton and nope never saw it There Will Be Blood).

1990: Driving Miss Daisy. What? I just love Jessica Tandy. “Hoke, you’re my best friend.” Oh it just makes me wanna hug somebody.

Teeny Part: Big Award. To Deserve or Not to Deserve. That is the question.

To Deserve: Anthony Hopkins, Hannibal Lector (Silence of the Lambs) won Best Actor in 1992 and was on screen for 25 minutes. He rocked it. And is by far the most charming cannibal I’ve ever seen.

Not to Deserve: Judi Dench, Queen Elizabeth (Shakespeare in Love) won Best Supporting Actress in 1999 for being on screen for a whopping eight minutes. Effin Judi Dench, man. I say they should’ve given it to Kathy Bates for Primary Colors, at least she was, you know, in the movie.

Biggest Pet Peeve:

A movie being nominated for best picture without also being nominated for best actor, actress or writing. How is it possible to have a kick ass movie without kick ass acting and writing? Riddle me that Avatar and LOTR!!

Favorite Year to Watch:

2009. Easy. Hugh Jackman hosted and there were musical numbers galore. Seriously best awards show I’ve ever seen. Oh let’s watch the opening number again, shall we? We shall!

Best Opening Ever

And now here we are in 2010. I feel like I’ve really dropped the ball this year. Of the ten (woo hoo ten!) nominees I’ve only seen five. Woops. I’m sure that if I were still fully-unemployed instead of semi-unemployed I would have found a way to see all on the list this year…But oh well.

The Nominees: A Serious Man, An Education, Avatar, District 9, Inglorious Basterds, Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire brought to you by Oprah Winfrey and Tyler Perry (or more commonly known as P:BOTNPBSBTYBOWATP), The Blind Side, The Hurt Locker, Up and Up in the Air.

Anyway, despite there being ten nominations this year, how were some still snubbed? I’m sorry if you’re too classy Academy, but Hangover won best comedy at Golden Globes. It deserves a little love (As does Stu's Song for best song. Epic, my friend. Epic. And most definitely known by more people than any Princess and the Frog song.) And Julie and Julia? Really? No love? You’d really rather watch District 9 than Meryl? Fine.

But it doesn’t really matter that I have only seen half the movies because apparently the only two that matter are Avatar and the Hurt Locker. Ok. Small soap box.

Hurt Locker: I see the merit, but it’s not a movie I fell in love with or care about that much. Sorry.

Avatar: Trite story. Big effects. Good movies can’t just be bells and blue whistles. I need a good story, one preferably that hasn’t already been told via Pocahontas, Fern Gully and Dances with Wolves. I don’t care if you hired a linguist to create the Na’vi language, James Cameron. Suck it.

I say give it to Inglorious Basterds. Hella entertaining and they blew the crap out of Hitler. You go Quentin!

And here’s what I know will be winning this year:

Mo’Nique will sweep the supporting actress category this awards season for Precious. And even though I haven’t seen it, she makes me want to, so I say enjoy your Oscar! (But shave the legs, this time, ok?)

Christoph Waltz will win supporting actor for Basterds. Why? Because he’s awesome. Best Nazi portrayal ever. Sorry Ralph Fiennes.

Jeff Bridges will win best actor for Crazy Heart. Didn’t see it, but I’m a total Jeff Bridges fan (from Duane Jackson to Gregory Larkin to The Dude, he very rarely does not rock), so I’m sticking with the hype and calling Bridges in it to win it.

Up will win best animated feature. Because I said so.

Happy Oscar Weekend Everybody!!

1 comment:

Katie said...

The Avatar hate needs to stop. You know you secretly loved it. And District 9? Really academy? Buhhhh.